The part why I stress.
Maybe it’s just me trying to escape the problems in my real home here, or me trying to find the better confinement and company. Or me trying not to be alone like I am today.
Three weeks of ‘school’ have passed and somehow I find my feet involuntarily walking back to LB. Maybe it’s just my three-month vacation sickness filling that craving. Or not.
It’s not the actual ‘studying’ that I miss and want right now, I actually hate that part lately. How I remembered not attending my first ever subject (because I was ill) and not attending morning subjects (because I was lazy). Another reminder to me right now to set my priorities straight. Acad load right now isn’t that heavy, it actually is light but really time-consuming.
It’s also not the ‘things I have to do’ that I miss and want right now. Nope, I didn’t want to be a head of logistics and publicity in my two affiliations. But I managed. And I will manage.
The part why I like weekdays.
Monday nights until Friday afternoons are my daily LB existence. And in that existential part is what I love, excluding the part I said above.
It may be my 60 other orgmates or my 10+ other Perspective guyth or my devcom hi’s and goodbye’s people or my PSS peeps or my bestie roomies housemates.
I don’t know, but I like just being there. I want to hang out at CHE lobby just thinking and killing time and trying hard to connect to ‘UPLB’ wifi, socializing physically and online at the same time. I like being in the [P] office even though it’s hot and butt-hurting, just laughing and ‘meeting’, and talak satisfies that rant crave. I like being in devcom series classes where almost all my recit classmates are the same people, I like being bibo and kwela and not actually doing articles or recording voice or learning systems or scientific papers, but rather making chika and daldal to everyone I’ll be with for the next two more years. I like being with those high school peeps I never get bored at, they keep that nostalgic thread firm and unbreakable. They’re one of those people who you can differentiate from then to now; these are the people you had a foundation, need not worrying about trust issues. And finally are the housemates, one I like slapping in the face, one who is barely evicted, one who rarely goes home at sunlight, one who is in a high school hormonal rage, and one antagonist who likes burrito.
These housemates who I hate and care, are the real reason why I hate fridays, they may not look like it, but some of them are people I’ve been friends with only since the first sem, some only since July, or only on April. I like being called Senpai because of my sole, actual, and real Sophomore standing. I like back massages and face massages with consumable hours. I like clingy texts and pagsusuyo. But I don’t like paying rent.
The real part why I hate Fridays.
I don’t like going home at 4 PM on Friday, dreading your arrival by the end of your 5:30 class, because I know that we have to pack things to go home (or wash the fishbowl and put 2-day worth of fish feed). Then by the time we have eaten dinner I don’t like knowing that we have to actually walk to junction because full jeepneys can’t hold us all together. I don’t like separating at all. You guys riding a Cubao bus while I sadly have to go alone and wait for an Alabang bus. I’ll send texts as soon as I got in the bus, trying to hold my existence existential to everyone. It’s what I hate: having to know that it ends at Fridays and starts on Mondays again. And as I write, I want to be back.
It’s like having to pause a game because you have to.
Hihi. The vacation feels took a bit longer than expected, but despite having to wait for the oh-so-awaited August 11 start of classes, I had been bombarded by tasks instead!
With the thought of school coming, it just gets me turned on. Whut? No people would ask me why I’m not in school, oh come on. No more lazy couch potato, no video games.
August, I can almost touch you. So much things to look forward to!
In the present, I could do nothing but to wait.